Archive for April, 2010


April 28, 2010

I’m pissed off right now. Not at the fact that the Twins are likely going to lose this game, but rather something else. I’m pissed at all the Twins fans that are about to blame this Twins loss on Jesse Crain. Forget that Scott Baker couldn’t pitch 5 innings, and after he was given a 6-1 lead, he promptly let the Tigers cut it to 6-5 in the next half inning. Forget that Denard Span, even though he probably should have been credited with a catch in the 6th inning, still dropped the ball, allowing the inning to continue. Forget that the Twins allowed 10 runs in 2 innings, and other than those 2 innings, they played a damn good game. Forget that Pat Neshek walked the bases loaded and then hit the next batter with a pitch that tied the game. No, let’s all blame the Crain Wreck because he gave up 5 runs (only 2 charged to him), including the go-ahead runs.

I usually remain pretty level-headed, except for the few times that I get really excited, but this is just terrible. Tonight’s loss cannot be pinned on one player, and it’s certainly not only Jesse Crain’s fault. Grow up, people.


Discussing The Howard Extension

April 26, 2010

Move over, Joe Mauer. You have just passed the Torch of Large Contract Extensions* over to Ryan Howard of the Phillies. For those of you that haven’t heard, Howard received a 5-year, $125 million extension, starting in 2012. Remember how the Twins wouldn’t give Torii Hunter the contract he wanted because he would be 37 at the end of it? Well, that’s what’s going to happen with Howard in this extension. 2012 happens to be his age-32 season, and well, we can all add 5 to 32.

* Which I’m sure some owners wish they still had in their possession. It would be handy in burning up some of those contracts.


Season Preview: Minnesota Twins

April 24, 2010

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know how late this is. I was planning on doing previews for all 5 AL Central teams, but rewriting Fergie’s awful* “Big Girls Don’t Cry” for the Kansas City Royals burned me out on doing the other 4 teams for a while. However, there was good news, since I had been working on the Twins song for several months now with my girlfriend Abby, so when I revisited it, the song was already 80% completed. Plus, the poor reviews on GB Leighton’s “Twins Territory” song made me feel like I had to fix this injustice. I figured that I had to use a song that was a classic; one that everyone likes.

* Awful in the sense that it was difficult to rewrite lyrics.

I bring to you a song that has made me laugh many times and caused me to wish that I had Weird Al Yankovic at my side to turn this into a real song. It’s even more awesome than Keizo Konishi’s apology to Joe Mauer. To Queen’s “Bohemian Rhapsody,” I give to you…


Selig To Span: “Stop Hurting Fans”

April 23, 2010


For most of the past decade, the Minnesota Twins lacked a true leadoff hitter. There was a time where outfielder Jacque Jones would hit first, but his lack of patience made him a poor fit. The Twins then traded for outfielder Shannon Stewart, and he briefly filled the hole well until his power and speed dissipated. There was even a time where Milwaukee Brewers center fielder Carlos Gomez was at the top of the lineup, but only his speed was a positive contribution. Then, the Twins finally discovered Denard Span in 2008. Although he was a first round pick and widely considered to be the successor to Torii Hunter, he was viewed as a minor league bust until his first call-up to the major leagues to replace Michael Cuddyer. He hit well upon arrival, and eventually wrestled the leadoff spot away from Gomez and became the hitter the Twins had been missing at the top of the lineup.


Recap: Twins vs. Indians Game 3

April 22, 2010

This is what greeted me when I visited “1,000,000 MINNESOTA TWINS FANS!!!” tonight. First, a little history…

You all know or have an idea of Fanatic Jack and his negativity. Well, Firstname Lastname* here was the polar opposite. Any time someone at “1,000,000 MTF!!!” had a complaint, Firstname would pop up and give his retort that we were being too hard on Nick Punto, Delmon Young, Gardy, etc. and would incessantly tell us to halt our complaints. Eventually, Firstname was banned because my fellow administrators were tired of his nonstop positivity.

* Borrowing Thrylos’ claimed first name and last name.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming. After today’s excuse for a game by the Twins, many people were left with a bitter taste in their mouth. I’m sure Fanatic Jack was gloating over the Twins only getting 4 hits off Mitch Talbot and Co., I looked like an ass after saying the Twins would get the sweep on the podcast last night,* and many people on Twitter were displeased with this 8-1 loss.

* I was very disappointed when I saw the bottom 3 in the starting lineup was Brendan Harris, Drew Butera, and Alexi Casilla. 2009 Game 163 lineup, anyone?


News That’s Fit To Print

April 21, 2010

Hello everybody. First, I will be on Fanatic Jack’s podcast tonight. It starts at 10:00 pm, and it sounds like I will be on sometime around 10:20. After a team effort on Twitter last night, it appears as though Jack may tone down his negativity for the future. Regardless, I feel that he provides a viewpoint – albeit extreme at times – that some of us may ignore, which helps keeps us grounded. I also believe that I’m the only guest, so I may be on there for the whole rest of the show. Second, I am happy to announce that I have a guest post coming up on, which means that I am now the Twins Most Valuable Blogger.

Roommate*: You do realize that they let various people do this every Friday, right?

Me: What do you mean?

Roommate*: It’s their Fan Friday. If you really are the Twins Most Valuable Blogger, then it’s only for one day. Besides, you’re not that valuable. You’re like Nick Punto…easily replaceable by someone of Matt Tolbert’s caliber.

Me: You’re joking, right?

Roommate*: No.

Me: … You’re a very, very bad man.

Roommate*: Meh. Like Delmon Young, I don’t care what you say to me.

* No roommates were actually quoted in the making of this post.

(Apparently) Why The Royals Are Bad

April 17, 2010

As you may know, I was working today’s game against the Kansas City Royals. After the game, I spotted four Royals fans taking pictures and talking to each other in the left field stands. I felt like striking up a conversation, showing them that fans of opposing teams could co-exist, so I asked them if they were from Kansas City. It turned out that two of them were actually from the Twin Cities area, but the other two were indeed visiting from Missouri. I continued talking to them and eventually our conversation turned to the lack of success for the Royals. Of course, I had to see how a fan felt about the team, so I asked a simple question: “What do you think is the reason why the Royals have been so bad lately?” A good chunk of the answer certainly shocked me.


Recap: Twins vs. Red Sox, Game 3

April 15, 2010

Strikeouts: The San Francisco treat.

First of all, check out this website: Did The Twins Win? This will come in handy when you only care where the +1 goes into the standings at the end of the day.

Pick your story of the day. Francisco Liriano handily beat one of the best teams in the league, Nick Punto brought his batting average up to .269 with three hits, Michael Cuddyer had one of the biggest wind-aided home runs I’ve ever seen…overall, it was a good game for the Twins.


Another Perspective of Opening Day

April 15, 2010

Hey there, everyone. I’m sure you’ve read quite a few impressions of Target Field and Opening Day, and I’ve found another one for you to enjoy. This comes from my friend Laura, someone I’ve known since high school and now works with me at Target Field as a first-year usher. Not only is the following text for Off The Mark, but it was also one of her school assignments. Plus, I want to fulfill the “we are” part of this blog’s URL, so the occasional guest post is certainly welcome.


Recap: Twins vs. Red Sox, Game 2

April 14, 2010

Today was the first Twins loss at Target Field. Anyone collecting baseballs from this game?

First off, you may know that I’m a huge supporter of Jesse Crain. I’m willing to bet there will be many complaints about him allowing a 3-run double to Jeremy Hermida, preventing Cuddyer’s home run from being the tying run, but here’s my retorts.

1. Crain should not have been facing a lefthanded hitter in Hermida. Jose Mijares should have come in, but he’s losing the faith of Rick Anderson and Gardy.

2. Crain intentionally walked J.D. Drew, then retired Mike Cameron, and then allowed the double to Hermida. Perhaps if he avoids the intentional walk, then he avoids allowing a single run.

3. Related to 2, who knows if the Twins would have tied or taken the lead without Crain’s inning? We don’t know if Cuddyer would have still hit his home run.